Non-Monogamy Challenge Day 8

8. How do you feel about coming out yourself? How has it affected your life either positively or negatively? (If you haven’t how do you think it will?)

I just remember Harvey Milk and his advocation of coming out that has actually been backed up by data – that if one more person knows a gay person, they are much less likely to be bigoted against gay people.  I think this holds true with any relationship or sexual orientation that one “has to” come out as – not one that is considered the default and isn’t obvious to the naked eye.

That being said, coming out is not an easy thing. And sometimes it can be a dangerous thing – it can lose you your children, your housing, your job, and sometimes even your life.  You are giving up any privilege you have.  That is a super hard thing to do.  And sometimes radically important.  You take the risk of potentially losing relationships that are important to you.

For me coming out has been an interesting bag – much harder to do with people my parents’ age and much easier to do with my generation.  That being said, my coming out with my parents, both as bi and poly (at separate times, separated by years) went very well, but I am still terrified about coming out as poly to the rest of my family.  And I want to, so badly.  It would be the best thing in the world to be able to bring whichever partner would be appropriate, would like the event itself, or whichever one is available, depending on the occasion.  That seems to be the situation that would be ideal for me.

I want to mingle my chosen and bio families, as much as possible.  Expand the love.

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