Revisiting the past…

Yesterday I went to Red Robin and had dinner and drinks with my first boyfriend (and first ex), from way back in high school.  We haven’t seen each other at all for a little more than two and a half years, and the last time was about five minutes a couple months after we’d broken up so I could get back my stuff from him–plus some stuff that was ours that he didn’t want to keep.  It was not out of the blue, however.  We have been casually talking on Facebook for a few months and we were going to meet up and do this sometime this summer anyway.

It was interesting, to say the least.  I had planned to arrive early, so I could be the first one there.  That didn’t work out so well because I had to stop at Target and get some Tylenol for my splitting headache.  So I only ended up arriving ten minutes early and he was already there and had ordered a drink.  My mom had given me twenty dollars earlier, to buy us our first round of drinks, because, as she has said to me before, she really does like him, and just thought that we should break up because it didn’t look like he was going anywhere significant with his life.  I got a lemon drop and after a little bit of talking we ordered food.

The conversation stayed pretty casual the whole time–there were things I was not going to mention to him and I’m sure there were things he wasn’t going to mention to me.  We talked about how our types (in regards to people) have changed and solidified.  I decided that it would be wise at that time to come out to him–he was a little surprised and said if he had known that back then he would have jumped on it.  I was shaking my head that time–that’s not your nature, you wouldn’t have jumped on it, it would have not worked out well–but I didn’t say anything because I figured it wasn’t worth it.  We ended up talking a little bit about sex after dinner–I think it was obvious on both sides that we had slept with other people since we had broken up, and that’s no big deal.  It’s natural.

Overall, I think it was a worthwhile adventure.  I thought for a while it would be awkward, but it wasn’t.  We got along fine.  Looking at it, I realized both why I had been attracted to him at the time (actually physically looks better now than then, so that obviously wasn’t a part of it) and why it was best and appropriate that it ended when it did.  We have both grown as human beings since then, in ways I don’t think would have been possible if we had stayed together, so I have no regrets on that front.