Today is Thanksgiving, at least in this part of the world (happy very belated Thanksgiving to my Canadian friends). That means so many things to me – it is so enmeshed in traditions, old and new, full of both bio and chosen family. It is a holiday of family – and that is what I am thankful for. I am thankful for the chance to get to create and make for those members of my family I can be with. For those I am not with, I am sad that I am not, but I am hopeful that they have joy today.
The holidays bring up starkly some unpleasant feelings about what it is like to live with some of my life in the shadows. And I cannot abide by that. It is important to me to celebrate with my whole family. It is important to me and who I am as a person.
You, my loved ones, you have given me the strength to work towards bringing my families together as much as I can, exposing them to each other, starting with my immediate families – chosen: Trydaen, Diplomat, and Lola (at least for starters – I would like to include June and Star and Lola’s kids, but I have to start somewhere), and family of origin: my mother, father, and sister. I know this will not be an easy process, but I am working on it. I am convinced that, whatever the pain to me, this is right. I cannot live any longer with parts of my life in the shadows. I cannot do this wrong.